As Michigan divorce attorneys, we know there are many momentous life events that people look forward to and plan for with great enthusiasm. Ironically enough, some of those same life events can actually cause the unraveling of your marriage and lead to divorce if you are not prepared for them. In this three part series we have assembled a short list of a few of these life events for your consideration.
-
Your In-Laws
Nothing is more frustrating than meeting the man or woman of your dreams, and then meeting his or her meddling, overbearing mother. Or equally awful – marrying the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, and then discovering that her parent hates you.
One facet of marriage is dealing with the family you married into; everyone knows that. But when that family doesn’t like you and has no qualms about showing it or actively works to sabotage and undermine your marriage, the relationship can deteriorate quickly.
We recommend meeting your would-be in-laws long before tying the knot if possible, and then discussing openly with your soon-to-be spouse any issues that may have arisen during that meeting. If the situation raises red flags for you, be sure to address them and watch to see how your partner handles them. It will give you an idea of what lies ahead so that you can be prepared.
-
Your First Child
Couples are usually over the moon about their first baby. They spend months discussing names, decorating the nursery, and planning for parenthood. But what no couple can plan for is the endless sleepless nights, irregular feeding schedules and never ending diaper changes leaving you exhausted and irritable. There is also the sudden loss of freedom. No more last minute dinner dates and spur-of-the-moment weekend getaways.
Children, and especially infants and toddlers, require a lot of time, attention and patience. This can quickly use up all of a parent’s personal reserves at a time when they are stressed out, tired and frustrated. Unfortunately, the person who tends to bear the brunt of this shortage is often our spouses. Certainly this can lead to marital tension, frequent arguments, and resentment.
We recommend having plans in place for this time of life. “Emergency” babysitters, either friends or family, who are willing to step in when the going gets rough, to give you a timeout so that you can collect your thoughts. Also, planning regular “date nights” so that you can get away together, focus on each other, and keep your relationship from taking a constant back seat.
Join us next time when we will be looking at the next few items on the list, namely Your New Home, and Your Lost Job.
Leave a Reply